Wednesday, March 29, 2006

I Can Tell That We Are Going To Be Friends

Sun. 9 degrees above 0. No work today. Newly burnt CD for today's driving. Old man checks the traffic to make sure I am good for backing out. Thumbs up.

I'm going out to play.

Thursday, March 23, 2006

A Little Inside...I Know

As promised, I am posting a story. A story that was created by the brilliant minds of a group of people who were high on life. Maybe a little bit of beer. And also the thought of retreating to the magic spinning wheel of shots. I thought it would be fun to have everyone write a sentence to create a story during the intermission at Wave trivia last night. Gallant had the glorious idea of folding over the paper and leaving a visible lead in to the next sentence so that the other people couldn't see what was previously written. So here it is. An adventure for the mind...

One day there was a little garden gnome sitting in a cupboard and he never felt so alive as he cruised in his convertible, up until Brent got so drunk that he couldn't stand, so he took off. When he got to Uranus he began to explore the under region where koala bears roam and the local people like to eat at Dairy Queen because it tastes like Tyler's socks that were left on the deck. Gawd that bastard can't get anything up! Then Goat's mom scrubbed the kitchen floor of all evidence. She put clean sheets on the bed, greeted her husband at the door. He then said, "What the fuck are you doing with a penguin in your bed?" He was so appalled by the situation that he went a-wandering in the woods to find something to save the world with. But he was sleepy so he did his friends a favor by giving out free orgasms and beer. They go good together, but not as good as the sheer terror that one day we will all be looking like Goat's mom after she's been fingerbanged by Brent, who was on her like a stink on a monkey.
The End.

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

These Apples are Delicious


The meal of champions. I rant and rave about breakfast. Almost everyday. Just to myself. I've posted about cereal, and about toast, but I would like to declare my love for breakfast foods. I love breakfast foods. Not only the food itself though, it's the feeling of eating those certain foods at that particular time of day. Right after you wake up. I'm not sure about the rest of y'all, but eating breakfast is the first thing on my mind when I get up in the morning. Even if I sleep in till noon. Your body is just awakening, your cells start pumping and metabolizing, ready for the first meal of the day. Ooh baby.

I like to mix up my breakfasts as each day goes by. So I am always prepared for any morning craving I might have. I usually have between 2-3 types of cereal, Cream of Wheat, grapefruit, eggs, breakfast meat, oatmeal, yogurt and bread readily available at all times. McDonald's breakfasts are rare, but treasured, occasions.

Time is an important factor when it comes to choosing your breakfast. If you have no where to be at no particular time, one should make themselves a breakfastpalooza. Go all out. Make 3 eggs, toast, cereal, stuff yourself silly. If you are late waking up and need a quick fix before darting out the door, then your options are much more limited. Toast or bagels are the easiest and most efficient. Oh and cream cheese...droooool. I'll dedicate a post to cream cheese later on. But yes, toast and bagels you can take with you. You can eat them in the car, would you could you in the car? Eat them! Eat them! Here they are! On the bus, or on the walk to wherever you happen to be going. So smart them breads are, eh wha?

I'd also like to point out something that seems to be overlooked, perhaps ignored. Dessert for breakfast, or after breakfast. It's uncommon, maybe because breakfast foods tend to be more sugary, fruitier, et cetera. But one should never neglect the possibilty of having a little sweetness for or after breakfast. If there is cake or cookies conveniently accessible, do not pass up the opportunity. After our birthday parties, Mom would feed us the left over cake for breakfast the next day. Maybe it was because she didn't want to make dozens of pancakes for a packful of girlies. That suited us just fine. Candy (like Nibs or Sour Patch Kids) makes for a wonderful start to the day as well. And can also quickly rid you from that terrible morning taste in your mouth.

Breakfast is fun to eat at any time of the day. Somedays I eat a standard breakfast meal for supper, or as a midnight snack. It feels like the day is starting all over again. So eat your Wheaties kids, and treat yourselves to some dessert in the A.M.

Saturday, March 18, 2006

iTune Boredom


first - 5 Days in May- Blue Rodeo
last - Ziggy Stardust- David Bowie

longest - Eyes of the World- Grateful Dead (16:05)
shortest - I Enjoy Being a Girl- Sarah Jessica Parker (30sec)

first - [ I Bificus ]- Bif Naked
last - Zoolander Soundtrack

1. Better Together- Jack Johnson- 81 plays
2. Break Down- Jack Johnson- 68 plays
3. Never Know- Jack Johnson- 61 plays
4. Rocky Raccoon- The Beatles- 60 plays
5. Little Wing- Jimi Hendrix- 59 plays

Already Gone- The Eagles

find “sex.” how many songs come up?- 6
find “death.” how many songs come up?- 0
find “love.” how many songs come up?- 33

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Hitting on the Moon Shine

I never was, nor am, a napper. Even as a kid when nap time was as much as a part of your day as play time, I would usually just lay in my bed and think kid thoughts, or just look out the window like a housecat. I just can't justify sleeping during daylight hours. They just seem so few and far between. Hell, I can't even justify sleeping through the night time on most occasions. I like my sleep, but I don't love it. Well, I love it on those mornings where I know I have to get up early. 8:30am classes used to be a bitch. Those were the times I truely loved sleeping. Especially on those warm, sunny mornings in early Fall. The sun breaking through my windows, my prisms bouncing tiny rainbows against my walls...that was pure rest. I guess even then it wasn't sleep. It's closing your eyes and simulating sleeping. I mean you never know you are sleeping, because well, you're sleeping. You are basically unconscious. It's the before and after feeling that really gets to you.

Out of pure exhaustion tonight, I had a nap. I actually made an effort to nap. None of this fall-asleep-on-couch-watching-TV business, I mean a put-on-PJ's-and-crawl-into-my-bed -and- set-my- biological-alarm-clock kind of nap. Mind you this was at 9pm and I knew damn well I was not going to sleep the whole night through, so I set my body to wake me up at 11pm. And by-frig boys, what time was it when I awoke from my slumber? EXACTLY 11pm. I amaze myself sometimes at the accuracy I can wake myself up without the use of the alarm clock. I do use it as a back-up though when I need to get up early. But usually I will wake up minutes before the hideously annoying sound begins and can avoid the whole shock of waking up the worst sound on Earth. I mean really, that is not pleasant. Having that sound as the VERY first thing you hear in the morning is bound to roll you off the wrong side of the bed. I even prefer the crows.

Despite my rage for the alarm clock sound, I do put myself through a torturous ritual most mornings with the evil, yet beautiful, Snooze Button. My Snooze Button allows for 9 minutes of undisturbed rest before the sound starts again. This usually lets me fall into a fast and light sleep for 8 of those minutes and depending on the lightness of the sleep I can hit the that Snooze button again at the speed of light. Barely letting a peep out. And back I go for another 8 minute doze. I like to set my alarm a good half hour (sometimes an hour) before I really should get up, just so I can bond with the Snooze button. It prepares me for the getting out of the covers part. Just as long as that sound isn't the first thing I hear in the morning.

Sleep and I truely have a love/hate relationship. I love staying up late, I love getting up early, I hate getting up early, I hate the amount of time it takes me to fall asleep. But I guess I need it, and sometimes I just need a good crash, like tonight. Now it's 2am and I may be ready to attempt sleep again. See ya morning Snooze.

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

You Win...You Always Do

I would just like to say, that many of us would not be the fabulous (and not to mention hilarious) people we have grown to be without the existence of this man. Today he has been inducted into Canada's Walk of Fame. So to you, Robert Goulet, congratulations!